The Time is Meow

Yesterday this websites defenses were penetrated by a unknown assailant using my log in credentials. Since this sites creation there has been constant attacks attempting to gain access. All have failed until yesterday…. more

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July 27, 2016

Guns for Gorillas

It has recently come to the attention of Monkeys Without Flamethrowers that gun violence against already incarcerated animals has been increasing. As we all know the solution to violence involving firearms is more… more

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June 4, 2016

Gorilla Sales Skyrocket After Latest Gorilla Attack

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June 4, 2016

112 MPH Monkey

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May 5, 2016

Gangsta Dolphins

Reports from several areas along the coast of California have indicated a sharp increase in dolphin related crimes. The suspected dolphins have been spotted gathering in large numbers and “wearing different species of… more

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April 26, 2016

To Throw a Stone

In my reading involving primates I came across articles about a chimpanzee named Santino. He lives in a zoo near Stockholm, Sweden. Each morning before people would arrive, he would calmly gather stones and put them in… more

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April 17, 2016

The Selfie Monkey

Selfies have become very popular in today society and people around the world cant seam to stop taking them. But is taking a selfie safe? Every year many people are injured and even killed in a attempt to take the… more

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April 13, 2016

Trunk Monkey

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April 12, 2016

Monkey Recall

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April 10, 2016

The Coconut Conspiracy

Do you drink coconut water or use coconut oil? If so that may have been end result of monkey slave labor. Currently it is believed that macaques are being trained and used in a form on interspecies slave labor in… more

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April 10, 2016