Monkeys Without Flamethrowers

Pyrokinetic Space Monkeys

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The year is 1951 and the United Stated has already launched 5 monkeys into space and all of them perished on their amazing journey. The first to survive was Albert VI. Some may say that the reason for his success was that the technology finally matched humanities ambition. Others speculate that Albert VI survived due to a cocktail of pharmaceuticals that he was given both before and during his historic flight. But the reality is quite different. Albert VI was the first know being from earth to come in contact with cosmic radiation outside the protection of our atmosphere and survive. The inadequate shielding exposed him to what would be considered a lethal dose of radiation but he would not let go of life.

Once Albert VI returned the government test began. These test stressed his body and mind until there was an unprecedented incident. In April 1952 there was a lab accident that injured 9 scientists and took the lives of 4 others. 7 cynomolgus test monkeys also disappeared, 3 males and 4 females. The lab incident was described as a spontaneous fire that quickly escalated to destroy several labs within minutes. The part that has been kept secret by the United States government is that all of the male monkeys were later found to be burned to death at separate location near the facility they escaped from.
Scattered reports of monkey sighting have persisted in the Florida since 1952 and incidents of fires have increased since 1956 (http://www.sjcemergencymanagement.org/wfdepth.html). The United States government has yet to comment and any incident involving the escaped primates and some say that the government has been tracking them since they escaped. There has even been speculation that this was the plan all along and that the escape was just an effort to increase the chances of producing monkeys with the same abilities as Albert VI.
The United States is not the only country that sent primates into space, monkeys have been sent into orbit by the United States, France, Russia, Argentina and Iran. Have all of these countries have been trying to reproduce the original Albert VI results? If so little information is known about their success or failures. But Albert VI was not the only US monkey to survive space flight and why would we send more monkeys into space if not to achieve a desired result? Does Russia have any primates with special abilities? Does Iran? And don’t get me started on France, I hear they have been in talks with a certain species that lives under water and breathes air. You know who.

 

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